Long update!

Hey all. I am sorry for the lack of updates. I'll try to update as regularly as I could ok? Bare with me, cus Im having my finals soon, plus I am still sick. Ya, I tot its over. You know that past 11 days of my healthy journey towards my 21st.. It was the most beautiful journey in my life so far. I was so happy to woke up and sleep at night with no signs of sickness. Amin, alhamdulillah. But I was down again on the night of valentine's. So sad. :( But I shall stop sighing and complaining. Must live each day as a present and not dwell on things so much. God dont like it you know. I really miss those times. 2007 was so fun. I am healthy almost for a year without getting sick, alhamdulillah, plus I was sooo much in love and I mean REALLY in love. Not that I stopped falling in love with him now. Just that.... You know that kinda feeling when U gets paranoid cus U think U cant be there for him cus Ur sick often and I really, really, really am having my very very very low self esteem right now. Almost 90% of my clothes+ pants are very lose now. No point in wearing belt or safety pins cus it'll still look unglam. Ok, must stop complaining. :( But I just cant help it, oh gosh.

Yet, the man whom I love, who present me with his heart on my 18th, told me umpteenth times that he'll still love me despite whatever challenges that will come thru towards our dream, but you know.... Sometimes I just cant believe whatever he say. Haiyaaa, dont know lah. I dont know why am I still in doubtfulness when he already showed his 100% truthfulness. :'( I am sorry Saifudin.

I never fail to remind myself of this love. I am the type of girl who MUST remind myself often cus I am damn forgetful. Plus at times, my feelings play hide-and-seek. But I thanked the one above for I am not like the past. I used to contact my exes when I felt that the love I am with is playing on me, you know.. Like over paranoid like that. Padahal, my significant other did nothing behind me or whatsoever. :-/ Damn, one ugly character I have inside me. (well, used to ok, now good good already! hehe) Now when I felt that the feelings almost gone, I will faster faster (please dont mind eh when my singlish start to come out, Im a Singaporean U see) go to my studydesk to reread all his love letters.

This was the latest tht he gave me on my 21st. I hate him for being so fa king creative. I tot I design more nice. ;(
But see. He use that kind of 45cent popular paper somemore. Life is so unfair. Haha.

Ok nw, lets recapped my life. Cheh, life or what!

So on the 13th February, my parents asked me to ask some close ones around for some 'doa kesyukuran' if I am healthy cus on the 12th I undergo scope. Well , I shall not post the pictures here lah eh. So disgusting to see me internally. I tot I am so bersih lagi suci. I mean, its scary to see all the things inside you ok! If u mati mati die die wana see, call me. I mms u. Haha.

Sorry if I didnt invite you. Initially parent asked me to only ask my ITE classmates, but I decided to call some of my other close ones around. Sadly Fyra wasnt there. Valentine's eve mah. Sapa mau layan aku? Hehe. Glad some of them can make it tho. I was really honestly humbly happy that I was ok on that day. You know.... I appreciate life even more right now. Each time I can walk and talk, I feel lucky so I turn on Britney's song LUCKY. Ok, so lame. -___- Sorry I am so lame. Teehee.

Besides my ITE gang, my dearest gf whom I didnt see for ages turn up!!! ZIN! Yes, she was one of the longest gf I have in my life! I have known her back since primary one! Same class, 1FF. Remember? Haha. Then she was the one who introduced me to my very first boyfriend during primary 3? Haha. Ohmygod. Why am I talking about exes again now? Shit, lets change the subject.


So here's Zin. Damn I loveeee her chubby cheeks! :) Thanks for coming and taking your time off for me sayangku. I love you, and thanks for the sweet gift! I loveee it!

Thanks guys for coming, nothing beats the feeling of being blessed and loved. Alhamdulillah, if I am healthy, next year I shall make my 22nd a better one. But I am blessed to have been given the health now while I am typing this. Amiiiiiin.


You know this brother of mine? I love him so much. He is sooooooooo good and caring towards me EVERYTIME I got sick. He will help me anything I want. And he's the only person who understand my sign language. Thank you adek. I really love you. & I wont stop loving you even if you wana stop layaning me when Im sick :') Cus you are my brother, and I love you for that. So please now, give me some of your fats. Hehehehe.


On 7th February, had advance dinner with family plus Amin's gf and my dearest bacenboy. Just over at Lot1's Siam Kitchen cus I was still sick. See my face la. So thick right my make up. Damm. I have to stop wearing thick make up. Look so ugly. Gotta start wearing tinted moisturizer only. Got to. Have to! *note to self*

Then on 19 February, which was on a friday was outing with dearest ISQ. Prolly will be the last as a class. Out and over to Botanic Garden. I was so the kampung when I reached there. Cus its my first time! So nice to finally got to go there lor! Saifudin dont like to entertain my wants and desire. He say he scared of all the trees. Plus confirm there got many mosquito. Later can kena Aedes. Haha. Ok, sorry sayang I put words in your mouth. Hehehe.

All the nice photos is with Aisah. So once she upload it all in FB, I straightaway will copy and upload here ok? :) The pic below was one of the most nicest pic captured in my camera. But haiya look at my leg. Tinggal tulang only. :( Actually not my leg only lor. Whole body left with bones. I need meat, but when I eat, I throw up. How likethat? Eh, ohgod. I am sighing again isit? Astaughfirullah1000x.
Then on 14th February, its Reena darling's engagement day. Triple celebration! Valentines, CNY and her day. She's smoking hot I tell you. Its quite a grand celebration for engagement. I wonder if I can get engage at her age anot? Hehehe. I want to be an ibu muda lor. But how? Macam mana nak kawin kalau sakit2 je? Plus Saifudin dah warning, selagi aku scared with fire and taknak blaja masak, cannot be his wife. Boleh gitu? Abeh skg ni kau matair dengan aku for what? Nak main kan perasaan dan jiwa batin ku kah kekanda? Hahaha.

At last got to meet this damnnn cute boy who's reena's adek sedara. Farell. Soooo cute and active you know! See his hair. So damn soft.

All of us. Sad that boyfriend kena work on that day. CNY mah. SOC tak cukop strength.

I will update again later ok. Now I wana go back to sleep. Start to blogged like 3 or 4 hours ago. Now its 10.05am already. I am at home alone with my brother. Parents and gram's over to Shah Alam. I am merajukking with my boyfriend. Cus he wants to meet me and teman me over at my crib. But I dont want. I tell him lets meet 2 weeks later cus its exam week. Cheh, bobual damn world peace ok aku. Then he smsed me so fa king long tell me that he really miss me thats why he badly wana meet me and he like keep on putting it on a repeat mode (one week already never meet lor) But I dont entertain him. (but i still love him ok!) I just tell him 'I malas nak argue , goodnight!' den member terus tak reply. Until now! 12 hours already k tak contact. Macam rindu pulak. So how? Nak pujuk or step tersalah send sms or just wait till he make the first move?

I gotta feeling that we are going to meet today. Haha. See how far king typical I am? K better go now. I need to start to do my unstart Frontpage already. But I tawakkal only. If cannot do, I dont do. I hate getting stress over the slightest things in life. Nanti tak pasal2 aku sakit again. Ok, daaaaah!